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splorp! the Evil Bastard’s Web Site O’ Doom - Harley Quinn

In July 2005, about a month after we moved into our new apartment (and I was almost, but not quite, healed up from my appendectomy), we went shopping for a pet. Because we live in an apartment, we ruled out cats (reeking litter boxes make me sick) and dogs (I strongly believe it is unfair to own a dog if you live in an apartment - they need a yard in which they can run free). On top of that, Mrs. splorp! has some allergies to fur-based animals. We both decided a bird would be a good idea. We originally had decided on a parrotlet parrotlet in new window, but when we saw this broken-beaked Green-cheeked conure Green-cheeked conure in new window, we couldn’t resist.

Broken-beaked Harley Quinn
"Her" mother accidently clipped the end of "her" beak and one of "her" toes when "she" was a baby.

Close up of Harley Quinn
It actually took us almost two weeks to come up with a name. Lots of vetoes going on. We finally named "her" Harley Quinn Harley Quinn in new window , after The Joker’s associate. The name fit well, as "she" turned out to be quite the little thief.

Harley Quinn stealing my OJ
"She" stole my orange juice...

Harley Quinn stealing from my coffee cup
My coffee...

Harley Quinn enjoys mashed potatoes
And even our mashed potatoes. After several months, we noticed that Harley was favoring one foot over the other. As this was the first symptom I saw with Drusilla, I thought it would be wise to take "her" to the vet to make sure it wasn’t serious. While at the doctor’s office, Mrs. splorp! had Harley "sexed". No, it’s not perverted. It was from this test that we learned that Harley was, in fact, a he (thus the end of the quoted pronouns). This sucked, as we had taught him to say "Good morning," "Hello," and, of course, "Good girl". It took a bit of time to change that over to "Good boy", but we managed.

Harley Quinn with Mrs. splorp!
While Harley likes to stand on my shoulder or Mrs. splorp!’s shoulder...

Harley Quinn wandering the floor
he does occasionally wander around on the floor...

Harley Quinn as The BatBird
We’ve trained Harley to do a few tricks, like bat-bird...

Harley Quinn training for "wings up"
And after some initial nudging..

Harley Quinn giving a successful "wings up"
... we got him to do "wings up" by flashing a peace sign and saying "wings".

Harley Quinn with his ring toy
Harley has a lot of toys; his favorite is anything with a bell.

Harley Quinn might be lion food
And if he’s bad, we can always sick the lion on him.

Harley Quinn in prison
Harley Quinn still in prison
Sometimes he’s bad (bites or screams), so into prison he goes.

Harley Quinn and Coca Cola
Proof that Harley Quinn is MY bird.

Check the next page for some videos of Harley.

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